Don't forget to laugh
When was the last time you really laughed out loud? Today, yesterday, last week, last month, last year even? Or can't you even remember the last time you nearly laughed your head off?
It occured to me recently I haven't laughed my head off for quite a long time, so you can imagine my sense of disappointment when I recently saw a comdian fully anticipating to do so, only to be a little disappointed that other than a couple of hearty chuckles and never felt humoured enough to lol, laugh out loud. As I gazed around the audotorium I wanted make sure it wasn't me but to my surprise I observed a rather hysterical individual who appeared to be having the time of his life.
The woman to my right warned me before hand she had a tendancy to make noises on being amused and asked for my forgiveness before the evenings entertainment had begun. I was a little disappointed that she didn't live up to her billing as a laughing hyena, perhaps it was my inabilty to roll the shoulders that hld her back.
And it got me wondering if I had forgotten to laugh, had I forgotten to let my guard down, had I simply become to serious about everything?
If there is one thing that winds me up, it when somebody says, 'you look serious' or you looked very stern this morning'. It is maybe a little inapropriate to be smiling like a Cheshire cat when a colleague is praying for the poverty stricken or an evil regime in Southern Asia. However the remark did enough to leave a mental note to oneself to not look so miserable when the next natural disaster occurs in the cold winter that lies ahead.
But it is not all that easy to laugh as a Vicar, much of one's time is indeed doing the things I signed up for which is death and dying and pastoral care of one's community and all the emotional implications that entails. It is an aspect of the vocation that is deeply rewarding but can bring great troughs of challenging situations, mental mind games, and enormously sensitive and emotional individuals who need someone to help themget through one of life's most very difficult challenges. Do they really want a Vicar who just bursts into tears with them? That's not to say one doesn't feel a great sense of sadness, becuase I most certainly do. Having the great honour to conduct a funeral for a family is really in all honesty one of the best things I feel I can offer as a priest. Being the man in control of the music, the context, the pace, the curtains, bring a uniqueness that is afforded to very few people, I can see the faces of all the gathered mourners and often I am faced with extrodinary grief and pain. That is most certainly not to be laughed at in any circumstances.
Caring for the bereaved is highly rewarding, there are no three kinder words a priest can hear after a funeral than, 'lovely service Father' unless of course you are are a woman! Seriously it raises just a little smile of acknoweledgment that it was done 'reet' as they say in Burnley and for that I have lot to thank my training incumbent for before he left me for another church and another Bishop so to speak!
And so I must remind myself not to forget to laugh even in the privacy of my study, or in my little sports car... Remember to laugh Father, remember to laugh. Trust me priests, worry, they take things on thier shoulders, they worry prayer isn't being answered, they worry about bums on seats. They worry that folk have stopped believing, they worry that 'Joe Bloggs' hasn;t been visited for far too long, they worry the world's gone mad, and they worry about themselves.
Of course that means we are just like everybody else then, with our long list of worries and how it's gone a bit serious.
And so this week I have tried my best to look for things to laugh at......it's been the richest of weeks but so far I laughed at the following.
1. A comedian called Kate Robins doing an impression of Kim Woodburn.
2. My puppy, Jasper chasing a leaf.
3. Dec on I'm a Celebrity.
4. Inapropriate Flatulence
5. Making the Verger jump out of his skin, from behind a curtain.
Not absolute belly laughs granted, but enough to sustain me through the dark times of winter and raise a reminder that among the difficult there should always be the undifficult. Taking time to smile, enjoy and see the lighter side of life. And to end, I always try to encourage those dealing with death to do the same, seek the happy times, search for the joyfulness, discover the photo's that make you weep tears of sadness becaause the event brought such happiness. By finding joy in the depths of difficulty it makes everything just a little bit more bareable, a little more managable, a little more hopeful that things will be okay.
When all hope is lost, it can be found, in the haziness of death, in the numbness of pain In times of adversity, remain hopeful, have faith, be strong, smile and laugh. Laughter is one of the greatest gifts given to us by God, if your struggling, dig deep, find it again as soon as you can and laugh until yo cry.
Till next
God Bless
Alextheanglican.
