Monday 28 March 2022

On line

 I have always been intrigued by media, television and radio, I recall a time when the family would come together shortly after tea to chill out on the sofa and watch the soaps and entertaining family shows which would keep us mildly entertained until bed time. These days the family lounge has become more of a drop-in centre where folk come to touch base, ask what's for tea, or say cheerio before entering the land of nod. It once was a place where the widescreen technology could certainly guarantee the full and undivided attention of it's customer unlike now where it is little more than a minor distraction. These days it is most unusual if the young 'viewer' in 'our' house is unaccompanied. The youthful hands that once gripped a loving teddy bear or a book has been replaced by the media devices  of multi media moguls like Apple or Samsung. These blue tooth companions are never far from sight, never left long enough to go cold and often become a parallel world that ignores the one we often struggle to negotiate in the 'real' timeline of life.


As a middle aged man who wreaks of nostalgia and Patterdale Terriers, part of me craves the day when our graveyard cupboard of board games and pastimes are resurrected. I live in hope that the mini Chess Set and Scrabble board game becomes nothing more than a prop for the weightier classics like Cluedo, Monopoly and Pictionary.  I live in hope that another Christmas of 'family' time will see some of the old classics like Mousetrap and Buckaroo rise from the dead stirring us into family unity, but sadly to no avail. After managing thirty minutes of modern family togetherness via a rather limp board game attempt at The Chase, the kids went there separate ways and descended into a yule tide evening of Snapchat, Facebook and Instagram whilst outdoing one another with loud music of the non seasonal variety with not even a sniff of Johnny Mathis or Noddy Holder.

As a man of a certain vintage, I suspect I am no better than the youth in my proximity, I have three sources of entertainment for the dog walk. Phone, Ipod or DAB radio, sometimes  or usually I am so unsure what to listen to I take all three, reluctant to leave the phone behind in-case I am needed like the PM in a moment of crisis which I never am. I am reluctant to leave the radio behind in case the battery fails on my ipod which it never does and I take the ipod in-case I get bored with Talk Sport or LBC News.

I don't think I check anything as much as my phone ! My phone automatically bleeps with updates from the outside world but such is my obsession I have brain trained myself to not trust technology checking devices every time I am in the vicinity of multi media. I check for emails from the Vicar, texts from the kids, and missed calls from The injury specialists who only deal in No win, No Win court cases.

On average I would say I get about 10-15 emails a day, I would say 13-14 are useless, unimportant tripe! Offers from Groupon, Tesco, Amazon. Spam from fake Microsoft accounts, Paypal account inquiries (I don't even have a Paypal account) and holiday offers for a two night stay in the Cotswolds which will include a cooked breakfast and a roaring electric fire. I get friend requests from people in New Guinea, I get followers on Twitter from dating agencies and American churches. I'm told there is 1 trillion dollars with my name on it in Tanzania. I can't look at a holiday online without it popping up at me from every single available internet angle. I get reminders from Facebook what I did four, five, six years ago, I'm told of peoples birthdays who I haven't seen for over thirty years. I'm invited to trace my family tree and I'm reminded if I haven't posted for 28 days to get something out there. Oh and I get discount incentives from Waitrose, Laura Ashley, and King of Trainers if I spend over £50 on my first order.. If only I could afford to shop at Waitrose, it just goes on and on.

Today I watched a cow get pulled out of water, it popped up on my Facebook feed, It has been watched over 3 million times, A cow getting pulled out of water got three million views, can you believe it? Also this week I have watched an upside down dog sleeping in it's owners bed. I have observed a marriage proposal at a Basket Ball match in America and I have watched a man in Alaska suffer a severe injury skiing off an icy roof and landed on his automobile. I have not actively sought this kind of entertainment, it's just there as I'm scrolling through multi media over my breakfast cup of Yorkshire Tea and my 'Farm Foods' Hot Cross Buns.

Being a religious person, I am frequently inundated with quotes, Bible quotes, quotes for life, quotes of well being. And of course I join in as a regular Facebooker, Facebook so kindly  reminds me, four years ago I posted a picture of a candle, with a quote ! I am as guilty as the next person. Such as the individual who likes me to 'like' and look at photographs of their Sunday dinner that mother has made, or the people who post bucket loads of holiday snaps in Pontins Prestatyn, simply stating  'Paradise'.





Well multi media is certainly not Paradise as far as I'm concerned. The Daily Mail news website lists it's top ten most read stories, In this modern world a most read story recently is the ever changing size of Katie Price' tits and her boyfriend.  Katie's breast enlargement was a most read story in the UK last despite all the real shite going on in our world right now. This is a full seven places higher than the atrocity that is going on in Ukraine. Whilst sparing a thought for Yemen and Afghanistan is almost impossible to get a mention anywhere these days.

The digital world has gone truly bonkers, we are consumed by a narcissistic news reel and fed some of biggest load of nonsense we could possibly imagine. As I sometimes sit in a quiet church I feel so disenfranchised with the digital world but yet equally I am so caught up in it as well. This very space, this blogging digital vehicle for expression and thoughts is just an example of the world we live in. But at least, hopefully I have a grasp on the 'other' world but I do worry that our young people are slowly but surely losing the comprehension of tradition and values.

The band, Talking Heads wrote a wonderful piece of music that I have on audio cassette and also on vinyl, and more recently on CD and MP3 and on i tunes, Spotify and Amazon. It's entitled 'Were On The Road To Nowhere' I truly hope that were not. Hopefully we might be being led into calmer waters, a new digital direction. Brexit, Covid 19, Ukraine, Katie Price, it get's a bit much for us, maybe it's just me, and I need to spend a fortnight on fortnite, A month on Wordle, or a lifetime on Football Manager. Who knows but h
ang in there Easter is coming, hope is never far away, the stones will role away soon and all will be well soon.

Till next time
Alex

Thursday 16 April 2020

The Walk


Somebody once said to me, ‘Where would we be without a sense of humour’? I replied, ‘Blackburn’? Which of course was a joke, after working there for 9 years I can officially confirm that some of the people from Blackburn do have a Sense of humour. But it’s not easy to laugh when Covid 19 is spreading quicker than the farmers springtime fertilisation of the fields is it?

I mean it’s hard to raise a smile or have a spring in one's step now the canal path has become like The Trafford Centre Boxing Day Sale experience. Apparently because of Covid 19 we have to now unofficially avoid eye contact and deeply inhale as we pass strangers before we can exhale as they get beyond the 2 metres safety line.  Woe betide if we dare to breath a ‘good morning’ or ‘good afternoon’ for fear it could result in a fixed penalty notice or a banning order from walking the towpath or even being struck by the dreaded infection.

There is a 'runner' I often see, but she struggles somewhat with the pastime as see never seems to get too far away from me. Perhaps it’s the new trainers or just the cold hard fact that like myself she has the wrong body configuration for running and should perhaps stick to crisps and walking the dog slowly.

Across the field I was struck by some pensioners talking, there were a good 400 metres away as I entered the field. So generously I would give them the benefit of the doubt that it was just brief conversation about weather and Piers Morgan. Imagine my disappointment as they were still gassing as I approached the ‘zone’ of fear. I chose to offer a hard stare to convey my disappointment in society’s elders so fragrantly breaking the government request not to socialise under any circumstances. I considered a Facebook video, to shame them into dispersal but reconsidered after one of them looked vaguely familiar.

I need to calm down a little, as by the lodge a man stopped to look at the new-born ducklings, and I held him guilty as charged for ‘standing’ without purpose. Was this a necessary stoppage, was it essential to stop travelling. Fortunately, he moved on, which was good for both of us as it could have turned a little volatile.

As I re-joined the canal, some adults were drinking SKOL larger, I knew because I recognised the writing, S K O L, that spells SKOL and whilst not an expert I know cheap larger when I see it. They were certainly contravening social distancing guidelines, and again I considered recording their inappropriate behaviours. Wisely I didn’t, as I judged them to be rather unfriendly due to the use of a swear word beginning with ‘F’ and ‘B’ and then another ‘F. So I moved quickly along and tilted my head to the left in a shy way, a bit like Princess Diana used to do.

I do like to wear my headphones when walking, and sometimes I even listen to music which is nice. However, I do think I upset the gentleman in tight shorts and wrap around sunglasses who was obviously distressed that I hadn’t heard his little bell which forced him to literally grind to a standstill. This caused all sorts of issues, not for him as he was away in no time, but the sudden pathway jam had played havoc with my double retractable dog leads that got more twisted than an Agatha Christie classic. After some time, I did manage to release the Patterdale's left leg, and the cross collie’s right leg, and both my legs before we were able to continue.

As I made the turn for home, a man was fishing and walking along the canal at the same time, I didn’t know if I should berate him or congratulate him so I thought better of it as he had a tattoo of bat on his forearm. A wise choice I felt as one can never be too careful in these uncertain times.

As I made the final approach back to Chez Frost, I passed a travelling community, whose caravan collection was almost as impressive as Haven California Cliffs near Scarboro. How magnificent I thought if not a little challenging to living in a space as confined as that. I quickly ok’d it with myself as a number of the community seemed to be heavily engaged in the restoration of a transit van that was perhaps in its twilight years just like the old cross Collie dog I was walking with.

As I got to the gate, I shut it behind me for fear of recriminations from the family inside, and put the key in the PVC door, released the dogs and removed my footwear. I was delighted that my allocated hour of exercise had taken my mind of this dreadful illness, as I pondered, where would we be without a sense of humour?

Till next time,
Alextheanglican




Sunday 22 March 2020

Stockpiling



Hi
I’d like to think that out of adversity comes humour, I can’t begin to think what the shopkeeper was thinking when I bought 30 packets of ladies’ sanitary products and 5 jars of instant coffee this week. I didn’t have the heart to explain they were for the food bank, but I’m sure he understood I wasn’t simply stockpiling.

Talking of stockpiling I don’t know if I should life or cry at the sheer self-indulgence of those who have descended upon the supermarket like hunters chasing the fox in recent days and weeks. What does it say about our society, have we become so intent on preserving ourselves that we put the needs of others out of our minds and pretend it is someone else’s problem? 

This evening I eaves dropped on some conversation among family members who work in the retail industry, they were basically discussing the horrible customers of the day, and from what I can gather they were certainly not in short supply. Listening in, it took me back to my retail life at Argos, there’s nothing more jarring than listening to somebody bang on about how their child’s Christmas had been destroyed because the remote control didn’t have batteries with it on Christmas morning! 

The general public on one hand can be painfully irritating, but on the other hand can be incredibly generous and kind-hearted. Over the last few days, we have been receiving parcels for our foodbank and the volumes have been staggering. People putting themselves out to make a huge difference.
 
I’ve recently been approached by a journalist, who is writing a book about super-heroes, she mentioned me potentially being in the book, but I was lost in thought for a moment. ‘Hang on, I hope you are not suggesting I am a superhero’? The lady, rephrased it, but I still felt that’s the way she was leading. The thought of ever being called a ‘Superhero’ is utterly bonkers…Superman, yes! Batman, yes! Wonder woman’ yes! But not a priest in Burnley. It got me thinking what on earth would Jesus say if I rocked up and stuck out my chest, giving it ‘Superhero ready for service’. I think he would laugh his head off, and besides, underpants over my cassock is certainly not a good look with my figure. 
No, I think he would quickly cut me down to size and say something like, ‘Erm, you’re not a superhero, your simply doing as you should be doing, nothing more, nothing less. ‘Now take your underpants off from over your cassock and get back to work.

And I have little doubt that we should all be doing that work that Christ called us to do, all wrapped up in my favourite quote ever, ‘Love thy neighbour as thyself’. I’d love to see that in flashing bright lights as the greedy beggars slowly get taken up the escalators in Tesco Burnley, and then flash up on their prepay terminal as they insist on loading up the clubcard points as well, and then 'greedy so ans so's to come on over the Boyzone soundtrack on the toilet roll isle. I’d love the totally stressed out person on the till ask, ‘Would you like to give your loo rolls to the homeless, cause they actually can’t afford to pay to use the public convenience, never mind the accessories that go with it.

Reassuringly and beautifully there are many millions of kind-hearted people who bust a gut and genuinely go out of their way to help others, I have observed that in abundance this weekend. But sadly, there is also a large group of self-centred, greedy, individuals that need to give their heads a wobble and get some perspective to the way they conduct their lives.

The next few weeks will see us being asked to work even closer and closer as community, some will succeed, some will try hard and do okay, and some will not give a fig what happens as long as they are okay and unaffected by COVID 19.

Those people are the ones who need the love of God as much as those on the fringes of society, in fact more. This is probably the biggest irony of all as many of those who struggle the most and manage to just about survive do so because of their faithfulness in the kindness of others through the love of Jesus.

And that ladies and gentlemen, is the genuine sadness, almost right up there with the virus itself.

Till next time,
Alex


Saturday 21 March 2020

Sunday Sermon Psalm 23


When I sat down last Monday to write my sermon, it was with a huge amount of uncertainty, Would the schools be open? would we make it to Tuesday’s PCC? Would we be able to church this morning, and would my dreadful back pain stop me in my tracks?
I also contemplated, how many of us have genuinely got our hearts and minds firmly fixed on Easter, or if we have understandably had our thoughts diverted to the Pandemic that is working its way across the globe.
And then I thought what do I say, should I remind you about your Christian responsibilities? should I delve into the very long gospel reading of John 9 ? or should I chicken out and go for the very short reading from Paul’s letter to the Ephesians? Well in the end I decided to none of those things. When I look at the readings, I don’t usually consider the Psalms, but this week I did, and as I did, it was the 23rd Psalm, The Lord is my Shepherd.
There are many places in Scripture that are powerful, so deep, that to recite them is to experience them. Psalm 23 is one of those places. As one scholar said, "The psalm itself is green pasture; the psalm itself is still water; the psalm itself restores my soul."
Psalm 23 is very personal. There are no references to "we" or "us" or "they," but only "my" and "me" and "I" and "You." This is David's testimony, his personal experience with God. And as relatively experienced priest it is a passage that I call on frequently in times of adversity and trouble. It remains a bedrock of funeral ministry, it is scripture that folk who haven’t been to church for donkey’s years can grab from the depths of their memory bank and recall from years long passed. And what makes this a constant friend is that it covers all of life. With simple beauty, it speaks of green pastures and still waters as well as dark valleys and enemies and adversities.
And so, this morning I invite you to a familiar sanctuary where you will see that God is closer than you think in times of crisis. My prayer this morning is that God so imprints His truth in your heart that you will find your confidence in Him rise above the storm clouds in your life and particularly this deeply worrying virus that us sent to ‘loo roll’ insanity.
In the Psalm, we read of the incredibly famous line, ‘As I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, which evokes numerous imaginary ideas, walking with pain, walking with illness, walking with disability, walking with depression or anxiety, but just like the gospel reading, just like Lent we are on a journey and be led somewhere, and in this Psalm we are most certainly being led by God.
I read this from an Australian author and a shepherd.
"The shepherd knows from experience that predators like coyotes, bears, wolves, or cougars can take cover in these broken cliffs and from their vantage point prey on his flock. He knows these valleys can be subject to sudden storms and flash floods that send walls of water rampaging down the slopes. There could be rockslides, mud, or . . . a dozen other natural disasters that would destroy or injure his sheep. But despite such hazards he also knows that this is still the best way to take his flock to the high country. He spares himself no pains or trouble or time to keep an eye out for any danger that might develop."
Sometimes we have no choice but to keep walking through, dangerous times, and circumstances, somebody else once wrote, when your walking through hell, keep walking. Sometimes in life we simply must walk through the valley of death and keep walking.
And so, the Psalm tells us we should be fearless in adversity, but that’s not that easy is it? when we are worried, and frightened because we simply don’t know what might lie ahead.
But again, a Psalm thousands of years old, can be a source of encouragement and confidence to Christians today. I think the Psalm gives us three bits of advice,
1.     Stay in God’s Presence.
2.     Understand the power of almighty God.
3.     Let God lead you.
As a child if I was ever frightened, I would always run to the security of my parents, but particularly my Dad. I suppose it’s a bit like if you take little ones on a Ghost train or walk a jagged edge of a mountain with children. The first thing they do is cling to you, they hold as tight as they possibly can, and gain assurance that you will be the one to lead them to safety.
Imagine how the child would feel, if the parent or carer, said get off, they would feel isolated and even more anxious. When I was a boy I hated sleeping without the light on, I hated the dark, I still feel quite uncomfortable in utter darkness, but my Dad would often, calm me down, put me to bed, tuck me in, retreat from the room, leave the landing light and left door slightly ajar. It worked wonders, and so I want to encourage, to leave your metaphorical light open and keep your door ajar confident that God is leading us all to calmer waters.
And so, God’s power is great it will and does overcome anything and everything, and history reminds us that, be it through The Great Plague, or world wars, or Foot and Mouth or Sar’s. God overcomes it, whatever it is God overcomes it.
And finally letting God lead you and comfort you, it is vitally important, both to Easter, and through the challenge of the Corona virus.
Your staff . . . comforts me, he said. He was referring to the shepherd's crook, with its hook on one end. A good shepherd would use it to guide the sheep, lest they stray away. Just a gentle tap of the staff on a lamb's side would move them back in the fold. And the crook could gather up a sheep from a place where it might have fallen.
And
David was supremely confident, not only about his present circumstances, but of grace in the future that would see him all the way home. He believed that valley times were appointed for His good. He learned things about God that could be learned no other way in the deep ravines of life. He stayed close, trusted in God's protection and guidance all the way. All because he could say, "The Lord is my shepherd."
And so, The Lord is your shepherd, when you are strong and mighty, but when you find yourself weak and uncertain of the future. So, in these challenging times, don’t look down, but look up and fix your gaze on Jesus the Good shepherd. Stick close to Him. Trust that He knows the way through this valley and will see you safely through. Believe that He has good reasons for taking this route, even though it is hard and unfamiliar. And hold on to the truth that there is something better waiting on the other side of this valley.
Amen.


Friday 20 March 2020

The Church is shut but not shut.


The Church is shut but not shut

Hi
As I walked my dogs through the parish the other day I got a real feeling of contrasting emotions. Near my home I get some of the most beautiful views of one of my favourite places, 'Pendle Hill'. It can be seen throughout the parish and is a great source of encouragement. It's like a huge magnet, reminding myself I should get up there as soon as possible.

On the other hand the sights can be a little less delightful, as I walked down one of the streets with boarded up windows. I was listening to my usual musical diet of 'Depeche Mode' and 'Leonard Cohen' when I heard a muted cry of 'Fr Alex', Fr Alex' I looked up to observed a half dressed individual smiling at me and asking 'What was I doing round here?' I smiled back and replied, 'Praying'. Standing in one place for a moment, soon became an infusion of C class narcotics that was somewhat overwhelming. 'What are you praying for'?was the next question, I had to think for a moment, what was I actually praying for on this actual street, that was cluttered with litter, and cars and glass and a atmosphere of emotional distress? 'Oh i'm just praying that things get better', I replied. 'That's nice, when are you singing another song', she said. You see I do these silly little tunes that I post from time to time, and she caught me unaware that my musical madness had reached such parts in a troubled street in a troubled town in East Lancashire. 'My response, 'I'm always singing my love', and I am I suppose, always  metaphorically try to sing the name of Jesus in many different guises, through words and actions. 

The Corona virus is unprecedented in our life time and will have far reaching consequences once nations get on top of matters which i'm confident they will. One of the consequences is that we will all have to change, and I hope for the better.

The thought of not working is frightening for many people but is it really that frightening? When was the last time you stopped for anything other than sleeping? The pace of life has become absolutely frantic for so many people, so fast that they can't stop unless they are forced to. So just for  a moment.

1. Stop working for money.
2. Start working for yourself.
3. Stop shopping to cram your freezers and shelves to bursting point.
4. Start sharing what you can.
5. Stop worrying.
6. Start creating.
7. Stop hurting.
8. Start loving.
9. Stop gathering.
10. Start believing.

If we are to change our habits because of a virus, then seek the positive things that change can bring us all. Community, Charity, Compassion and care. If you are forced to stop work, use the break for your good. Read, walk and talk, discover the opportunities rather the consequences. These challenging times will bring out the best in you if you allow them to. Keep your sense of humour, keep being faithful and keep in touch with each other. This virus will offer a radical contrast to your present situation, in the 'unusual', embrace the 'practical' and the 'delightful' and all will be well. 
Pray things get better,
till next time, love and prayers
Fr Alex
Vicar, St Matthew the Apsotle with Holy Trinity Habergham Eaves.

Wednesday 4 December 2019



Hi
Well could Advent get any more exciting? I've just opened day four on my 'Swizzels' not very religious Advent Calendar and demolished in no time at all the offering of a small packet of Parma Violets. Not to be confused of course with the upmarket deli meat sold in Lidl and other posh supermarkets. Of course, Parma violets are a sweet 'tablet' not too dissimilar to a 'Rennie' or a 'Paracetamol', all a moderate life enhancer only distinguished with taste a little like a Baylis and Harding bath bomb, that catches one's tongue on a rare pamper night off from ministry in the Eastest parts of East Lancashire.



Parma Violets




The closest connection I can make from the tiny piece of confectionary is that it is purple just like the colour that represents this run up to Santa coming down the chimney. Other than that, I can make no connection at all, even less so with a 'banana skid' or sugar infested 'drumstick' of the edible stick, lolly variety. Our house is now awash with all things Christmas. We have extension leads attached to extension leads attached to extension leads, as we endeavour to illuminate every crevice on the vicarage to entertain the passing traffic in the run up to Christmas. We have yankee candles that whiff of Christmas puddings and Brussel sprouts, we have the obligatory 'snowman' snow globe, a Santa that’s flies across the roof, a tree that is more artificial than Katie Price’s breast enlargement and an Amazon Echo that has Fairy Tale of New York on constant repeat. We have a packet of 'Bernard Matthew's' sliced Turkey breast in the fridge and we have a sparkly natvity scene in the hall.
Isn't Advent wonderful?



A Yankee Candle



 As a Vicar, December is very busy time, but I constantly remind myself that trips to Panto, coffee shops, nativity performances, singing loudly, eating extraordinary amounts of mince pies isn't really work but more of a joyful engagement with church events and community organisations. 

I suppose when I compare it to the best part of twenty years working in the retail sector, I can say with a reasonable confidence that no matter how busy things get as a Vicar, it's never quite an 'Argos Christmas'. Oh, how I miss being insulted by members of the general public because a Tamagotchi in pink is no longer available four minutes before we close the doors on Christmas Eve. How I miss drunken humans of the male variety asking me, 'What might their 'Mrs' like for Christmas'? or How it's my responsibility that even at Christmas, miracles haven't extended to the 'Vax' vacuum cleaner doesn't washing its own filters or removing cheese from the flexible extension hose. Isn’t Advent wonderful?



Vax filters


To help me this year I have bought a book about Advent, all I need to do now is work out what the big words mean, but as a simple man I was strangely drawn by the front cover. As soon I realised there was no 'colouring in' to enjoy I  set about reading the daily reflections to help me arrive at Advent spiritually intact and full of hope and joy. Well it's only day four as I alluded to a little earlier in my hilarious reflection about advent calendars, but as it goes it is quite a nice book. It not too heavy or pious (a bit like a priest I know) and it is beginning to form a bit of a simple thread. And that thread is all about love, love coming down at Christmas, through the gift of the little baby boy born in a stable on Christmas Morning. Incidentally if you are not familiar with the nativity story, you can find a wonderful episode of Michael Crawford’s, 'Some Mother Do have Em' from the late 1970's that explains it exceptionally well and in brief but glorious and great detail.



Michael Crawford (aka Frank Spencer)

And I suppose I simply want to encourage you to express that love to one another throughout the rest of Advent.
In,
1. The Supermarket when you are squabbling over 'free range' or 'caged eggs', eggs.
2.  The car Park when your spouse can’t reach the ticket machine.
3. The department store lift, when you simply can't depart level six no matter which button you press.
4. The Christmas market que for the very reasonably priced glass of Mulled Wine.
5. The generosity you afford you neighbour in the battle over the 3 for 2 deals in Boots the chemist.

So it's important to stay cool this Advent, maybe listen to 'Johnny Mathis sings Christmas' or perhaps, watch a great Christmas movie like, 'Flubber' or 'An American Werewolf in London' maybe knit a jumper or go sledging in a field without cattle. Maybe get a dog and walk it around the house, or purchase a kitten from Aldi. Maybe go Carol singing with some people of the opposite sex, maybe build a snowman in Farmfoods, just do something pleasant in the name of love this Advent!

No, for sure Advent is an interesting time, none more so than randomly wearing the colour 'salmon' in church on the 3rd Sunday of Advent, but please, whatever you do, be kind, give thanks, and share the love of our most beautiful gift we could ever receive this Christmas,
the gift of Jesus Christ.
till next,
much love,
Fr Alex




Friday 23 November 2018



Don't forget to laugh

When was the last time you really laughed out loud? Today, yesterday, last week, last month, last year even? Or can't you even remember the last time you nearly laughed your head off?

It occured to me recently I haven't laughed my head off for quite a long time, so you can imagine my sense of disappointment when I recently saw a comdian fully anticipating to do so, only to be a little disappointed that other than a couple of hearty chuckles and never felt humoured enough to lol, laugh out loud. As I gazed around the audotorium I wanted make sure it wasn't me but to my surprise I observed a rather hysterical individual who appeared to be having the time of his life. 

The woman to my right warned me before hand she had a tendancy to make noises on being amused and asked for my forgiveness before the evenings entertainment had begun. I was a little disappointed that she didn't live up to her billing as a laughing hyena, perhaps it was my inabilty to roll the shoulders that hld her back.

And it got me wondering if I had forgotten to laugh, had I forgotten to let my guard down, had I simply become to serious about everything?
If there is one thing that winds me up, it when somebody says, 'you look serious' or you looked very stern this morning'. It is maybe a little inapropriate to be smiling like a Cheshire cat when a colleague is praying  for the poverty stricken or an evil regime in Southern Asia. However the remark did enough to leave a mental note to oneself to not look so miserable when the next natural disaster occurs in the cold winter that lies ahead.

But it is not all that easy to laugh as a Vicar, much of one's time is indeed doing the things I signed up for which is death and dying and pastoral care of one's community and all the emotional implications that entails. It is an aspect of the vocation that is deeply rewarding but can bring great troughs of challenging situations, mental mind games, and enormously sensitive and emotional individuals who need someone to help themget through one of life's  most very difficult  challenges. Do they really want a Vicar who just bursts into tears with them? That's not to say one doesn't feel a great sense of sadness, becuase I most certainly do. Having the great honour to conduct a funeral for a family is really in all honesty one of the best things I feel I can offer as a priest. Being the man in control of the music, the context, the pace, the curtains, bring a uniqueness that is afforded to very few people, I can see the faces of all the gathered mourners and often I am faced with extrodinary grief and pain. That is most certainly not to be laughed at in any circumstances.

Caring for the bereaved is highly rewarding, there are no three kinder words a priest can hear after a funeral than, 'lovely service Father' unless of course you are are a woman! Seriously it raises just a little smile of acknoweledgment that it was done 'reet' as they say in Burnley and for that I have lot to thank my training incumbent for before he left me for another church and another Bishop so to speak!

And so I must remind myself not to forget to laugh even in the privacy of my study, or in my little sports car... Remember to laugh Father, remember to laugh. Trust me priests, worry, they take things on thier shoulders, they worry prayer isn't being answered, they worry about bums on seats. They worry that folk have stopped believing, they worry that 'Joe Bloggs' hasn;t been visited for far too long, they worry the world's gone mad, and they worry about themselves.

Of course that means we are just like everybody else then, with our long list of worries and how it's gone a bit serious.

And so this week I have tried my best to look for things to laugh at......it's been the richest of weeks but so far I laughed at the following.

1. A comedian called Kate Robins doing an impression of Kim Woodburn.
2. My puppy, Jasper chasing a leaf.
3. Dec on I'm a Celebrity.
4. Inapropriate Flatulence
5. Making the Verger jump out of his skin, from behind a curtain.

Not absolute belly laughs granted, but enough to sustain me through the dark times of winter and raise a reminder that among the difficult there should always be the undifficult. Taking time to smile, enjoy and see the lighter side of life. And to end, I always try to encourage those dealing with death to do the same, seek the happy times, search for the joyfulness, discover the photo's that make you weep tears of sadness becaause the event brought such happiness. By finding joy in the depths of difficulty it makes everything just a little bit more bareable, a little more managable, a little more hopeful that things will be okay.

When all hope is lost, it can be found, in the haziness of death, in the numbness of pain In times of adversity, remain hopeful, have faith, be strong, smile and laugh. Laughter is one of the greatest gifts given to us by God, if your struggling, dig deep, find it again as soon as you can and laugh until yo cry.
Till next
God Bless
Alextheanglican.


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