AGONY BEFORE THE ECSTASY

Hello from Rydal Hall,

I write this blog on Sunday morning near the end of our penultimate study weekend before the end of this year’s studies. I have not been blessed with the picturesque view this time that overlooks the Rydal Hall gardens and rolling countryside. On this occasion I have one of the less salubrious rooms which has   a much less romantic window view, the car park !

It has been a rather somber weekend to be honest, I rather felt for our guest speaker as between the studies the tea breaks the conversations were very much about the future of our training institution. The sad news that the college is to be wound up in the next 12 months is disappointing and unsettling for the students who still have further studies to complete over the next few years. Far from feeling ‘I’m alright Jack’ I feel the sense of frustration and disappointment as students and tutors contemplate the future.

Alongside all of this I have yet to experience the ecstasy of what lies ahead as my day of ordination draws closer. I have yet to feel happy that I leave work in just six days to supposedly enjoy a long vacation before the big day. It is fair to say that the mind games, the fears and anxieties are probably at maximum right now and is compounded by the massive changes in my life. Moving house, leaving work, being ordained, not being able to be at home for important birthdays all appear to be taking their toll. The impending anniversary of my Fathers’ death looms which evokes sad thoughts mixed in with joyful memories, the cogs in the brain are working at overtime I can tell you!

One of the joys or not having to deal with ‘stress’ is it affords me with waking up very early and I have beaten the alarm pretty much on a daily basis for the last few months, and as I wonder around my new home waiting for the kettle to boil I wrestle with the conversations in my head, Am I doing the right thing? Is everything going to work out okay? Will I make it to the 4^th of July (Ordination day) in one piece? The kettle clicks and breaks the thought process and I usually immerse myself in internet newspapers and endless links to football reports to take me to another place before I wake the Frost household.

I recall starting training three years ago, the long journeys, the sleep overs away from home, the reading was all so exciting but now as I sit in my room before our morning prayer cell, you find a man feeling rather weary and looking forward to taking a well deserved break.

And yet in the doom and gloom of this blog, I remain utterly devoted to my vocation. I believe and pray it will be worthwhile. To get to something better sometimes we have to suffer and there is no greater demonstration than that of our Lord Jesus. This journey to ordination is incredibly unique, it is not something for the faint hearted, but out of difficulty out of turmoil can, and will come peace.

I am spending a lot of time in prayer right now, for myself, for my family, for my colleagues and for my ordinand peers. It is not an easy time, it is a challenge, a change, a fear, but it is also rewarding, exhilarating, honest and manageable (just) and to get to ordination by hook or by crook will be a relief and wonderful achievement. The prospect of getting on with being a curate and father is a goal worth striving for, reassured that God has everything under control even if it sometimes feels to be not the case.

I have an emotional week ahead of me, I leave the place that has provided for my family for 15 years, I leave some wonderful people behind, I will miss them dreadfully and it will feel strange waking up this time next week no longer a store manager but a man between jobs. I lose the control and responsibility for sales, costs, health and safety, development, people, customers, and I prepare to take on the responsibility of being an agent for God.

If you are so inclined please pray for my family, for my children and my best friend and rock, Sarah.

May God go with you this day and always

Much love

Alextheanglican. 

Moving On (part two) Goodbye shoppers.....

Hello friends of faith and non,

Thirty one years ago I left school at the age of just fifteen, I left with the lowest grades possible and on some occasions lower than that. My Mum was beside herself with worry at what I would do next, and after a 16 hour YTS placement as a trainee cricket grounds man fell through her stress levels accelerated dramatically. Then an opportunity to be a trainee golf pro with green keeping duties was turned down by my good self, the future was looking bleaker than a salesman flogging inflatable crocodiles on Southport beach. Well it was if you were my mother, for me it seemed a lot less concerning and one morning, I informed my parents I was going out to get a job.

Unlike now when I was a youth towns had lots of shops and I stumbled across a little electrical emporium affectionately known as Curry’s, I entered the shop hopefully and left the shop ecstatically. For kids of a less academic persuasion the preferred route for folk like me were YTS schemes.  Twenty six pounds was the going rate, and I had just walked out of a store with double the salary and guaranteed full time employment. My job title was to be Van Assistant which was a nice way of saying general dogs body and lifter of heavy things.

I worked for the Electrical magnate for a couple of years were I squandered most of my wages on vinyl records and ZX Spectrum software. I was a young man living the dream.

A bit more money led me to a small independent company based in Padiham, and as previous blogs cover a tale or two from that experience I shall swiftly move on and I shall also bypass a short experience as a confectionary rep working for a wholesaler that was significantly more expensive than its competitors. It resulted in poor performances by myself and the company and a rapid return to the retail sector!

I worked for a long standing family firm Harry Garlick TV Centre twice and it was only the enticement of selling sweets and crisps to unenthusiastic shop keepers that prevented it be a once in a lifetime experience. Harry Garlicks was unique to say the least and it was here that I ventured into the world of Retail Management; I was appointed Assistant Manager where the irony was that only two people worked there. I was the trusty right hand man until a fall out with the Manager resulted in a number of years floating between Nelson and Burnley and Burnley and Nelson.  The work was sedate, the company was male and the salary was poor enough to be lambasted by my late father in law for earning shit money! On the plus side the owners were genuine and humble, the job was secure and the laughs were unending.

The birth of the lad Joe, was a big thing in my life, I promised my partner (now wife) Sarah a house with a garden and not long after the boy arrived I was offered the role of electrical supervisor for a company called CBS a clearance division of the catalogue giant GUS (Great Universal Stores).

I spent a couple of years selling all the 'shite', customers had returned or didn’t want and some of the clientele  and sales were extraordinary. I watched and observed how not to manage people and problems as sickness levels rose and staff turnover increased until a wonderful Area Manager ironically a Mr Bishop recognized my potential and shipped me out to Chorley where I was placed under the leadership of a now very close friend called Kath, she was the first business leader that I believed in, she had the full skill package and knew how to get the best out of the customers and those that served them. She looked after me, she allowed me to make mistakes and she ensured I didn’t repeat them, she taught me the value of respecting colleagues and customers and she remains a huge inspiration in my life, we laughed together and cried together. The wisdom she imparted on me as she lit up another ciggie at the backdoor was vital and we have a enduring friendship that is special to both of us.

Through her leadership I became a leader myself, I helped open a big store in Castleford and was offered a wonderful opportunity with a big pay increase to go and work in Manchester. Long hours and a difficult environment was the opportunity on offer and after much pressure and persuasion I turned down the opportunity believing something else might come up. It did! It was to be at the dreary, unloved, low potential shopping precinct in Walkden near Bolton. I became the Store Manager. It was to be my first opportunity to be a store Manager and I took it with both hands, the store did really well under my stewardship and I started recognizing my ability to do even more than this. A rare treat was watching people meet Irish family favorite Jimmy Cricket, I had the opportunity to do the same but politely declined !

Fifteen years ago I joined Argos as the Deputy Manager at the store in Accrington, Unbeknown to myself I had joined a store that was in virtual terminal decline, moral was on the floor, bitching was common place and not many folk wanted to talk to me, let alone embrace me. It was horrible and I hated it, I really hated it and a Senior Manager from CBS caught wind of this and tried to entice me back to Great Universal Stores. The highlight of this experience was meeting a friend called Mark, He taught me so much about tolerance and single sex relationships,I'm not sure he is aware but he remains a pivotal part of my journey!

Back at the coal face I was ready for dumping Argos, brief case packed and already to go; in fact I resigned my position until one morning a Senior Argos Manager rolled up and persuaded me to stay by waving the wallet and asking me to run the Store on a short term basis. This was an incredible opportunity and one I was not going to let go. Even now it became one of the most rewarding and successful periods of my management career, I humbly report me and Mark and our team turned the store around and results and moral went through the roof to unprecedented levels, As a result of this I was permanently  appointed and encouraged to consider another unknown opportunity when the area boundaries changed shortly after.  I followed my line manager to the Greater Manchester area, in hindsight I shouldn't have he was a bit div! I briefly ran a store in Rochdale before accepting the Deputy Manager position at the Argos flag ship store in Manchester Ancoats, Argos didn't get bigger than this. This superstore took serious money, we had hundreds of staff, thousands of customers and I was way out of my depth! I learnt a harsh lesson at this point, money was a carrot but the huge increase in salary came at a huge loss, being that of happiness and job satisfaction.

Not long after I met another individual who was to have a massive impact on my life and career. An Area Manager named Paul was to be my salvation, we didn’t know each other but he recalled something outrageous I did at an Regional gathering at Blackpool Pleasure Beach and fortunately for me that moment of silliness was enough to persuade him to offer me a return to Store Management in the beautifully sounding Huddersfield Pack Horse Centre. It was to be a fantastic move where I rediscovered my mojo and started enjoying working life once more. The hour long commute was so useful as my sanity was restored under his inspiring leadership. Our personalities contrasted significantly which I believe was the recipe for success, never before had I had the trust and autonomy to lead a team of my own and I like to think I repaid his trust.

Within six months Paul gave me the keys to a wonderful opportunity which was to open a brand new state of the art store over in enemy territory Blackburn, which was to be my retail home for the next 9 years of my life. Daily routine was frequently interrupted by proudly being involved in the opening of new stores and conducting numerous disciplinary hearings and leading the area in Financial Services. At Blackburn Townsmoor the memories are far reaching, laughing with DK, going on the telly with Janine, Spotting a Mona Lisa in the toilet, and laughing, and laughing and laughing all the way with me dear mates, Whitto, Skelton, Mcca and Winfield !

Another area boundary shake up occurred and saying goodbye to a friend and boss Paul, was incredibly moving as this highly respected gaffer got the most wonderful send off you could possibly imagine. Vicky my new boss came onto the scene and remains my line manager to this day, we have had our ups and downs but I feel pretty certain a mutual respect between us both means a friendship will continue long after my final days as a shopkeeper. We have shared moments of hilarity and hysteria and we have had the difficult conversations regarding store performance and personalities. Blackburn Townsmoor is a beast of a store, it is not for the faint hearted and the management challenges it presents means nerves of steel and an iron will are required to get the best out of this retail juggernaut.

As Vicar Training approached I realized I couldn’t give the business what was required to run this monster and asked for a move, and what a move! To my beloved home town of Burnley Three and a half years of joy, utter joy. What personalities this store has, I'm not happy saying goodbye!

This retail blog could go on forever recalling some of the personalities that I have met and worked with over the years and if you are reading this and wondering if Alex remembers, this experience or that moment of hilarity, or the time we fell out, or the hard decisions that were taken then I probably do.

I have met hundreds of colleagues over the years; I have had the pleasure of working for a strong business Argos, they did indeed provide us that house with a garden. The people I have seen start as kids in their first ever jobs who have gone on to have successful careers is just brilliant. The promotion or recognition of friends I have worked with is just fantastic and The friends I have made are something I will treasure forever.

In all honesty I don’t think I was ever the finished package, I was never quite prepared to give my life and soul to the business and probably spent far too time entertaining the troops and making light of serious business matters. My philosophy was usually, why can’t we laugh all the time? I of course know that we can’t laugh all of the time, but that’s just me I suppose as I  happily prepare to give my life and soul in serving God.

What I do want to conclude with though is my massive thanks to all who have stuck with this blog thus far, it probably suggests we have a mutual respect and friendship and for that I am most grateful. Retail friends, you have been part of an utterly incredible journey and I never thought my pathway would change so dramatically and never envisaged leaving the retail world at the age of 45.

Thanks so much for being part of it, I have four weeks left in this working environment before taking a sabbatical before embarking on the next leg of life. I was presented with some wonderful gifts at my last Managers meeting that I will treasure forever. I hope the memories you may have of me as a shopkeeper in the main will be happy and positive. If I happened to have  been the one who dismissed you or encouraged you to leave the business, forgive me, it was just business!

I shall hold you all in my prayers

With much love

Alex (the Anglican)  

Moving on (Part One)

Hello Friends,

I suppose Holy week is not the ideal time to move house but as the children are off school it seemed as good a time as any to pack up and clear out our belongings and head for pastures new.

I have just returned from one of my favorite walks for the last time as a resident of Lower Manor Lane Burnley and as I write this blog you catch me in a slightly reflective mood on this rather damp Palm Sunday evening in late March.

 I sometimes wonder if it was Gods purpose for me to get Fletcher my beloved rescue dog that has walked probably hundreds and hundreds of miles as my faithful companion around the beautiful countryside that surrounds our home. Our favorite walk is through the woods and over the bridge, past the farm with horses ensuring we take care when crossing the busy main road before heading out upstream along the fast flowing river before we cross the water and climb up a usually boggy hill. We then slowly meander home by the side of the dark waters of the Leeds and Liverpool Canal.  It is a stroll that has presented me with many hours of prayerful walking whilst spotting some of Lancashire’s most spectacular wildlife. Big deer and baby deer, Parenting foxes and their cubs, Owls and Kingfishers, ducks and geese and my personal favorite the incredible site of a Heron hunting for fish and then buggering off in glorious flight with its prey. It’s not all been beautiful mind, I’ve stood in dog shit, bypassed used condoms, and the despicable sight of unnecessary fly tipping has left me angry and frustrated.

However besides the negatives I would describe myself as a real enthusiast of nature and the countryside. It has afforded me important time and space to have a chat with the Lord, and work out the ups and downs of his calling upon me. I remember on one very snowy occasion being really frustrated about things and getting rather impatient with God and having it out with him. I approached a notoriously treacherous point in one of my ‘other’ walks when the most beautiful Robin landed on a snow covered gate post and stopped long enough for me to see every color and feature of this stunningly beautiful little creature, it took my breath away as it sat there watching me watching it, before it moved on to pastures new.

So here I am with my family in the first stage of moving on to pastures new not completely packed up but if the aches and pains are anything to go by we really can’t be that far away. The rooms have a bit of an echo and the half filled boxes make ‘home’ look messy and unsightly and when they say moving house is stressful I certainly wouldn’t argue against such a proposal. God has called us to be somewhere else although not far away, just t’other side of town to be precise. It will be a new experience for us, living on a busy main road but in a large Victorian house that I trust in God enough to be positive it will be a wonderful and enriching experience for me and my crew.

It is part one of a series of changes to mine and my families’ life and in just a few months part two will take place when I leave the world of retail to rest up and be free to enjoy 6 weeks of rest and resuscitation before ordination in early July. I will continue to explore Gods creation with Fletcher and the wildlife that accompanies us on our strolls around East Lancashire.

Lower Manor Lane is a home that we will hang on to for things later in life, it has been the most perfect residency for our family and we have experienced joyful births, a wedding and the tears and upset at the passing of some of our most beloved family and friends. It has given us some incredibly happy moments, special events have been and passed and therefor it is with a very heavy heart that we say goodbye to a home that we have loved dearly for the last 15 years or so of our lives.

The Vicarage that awaits us has a great deal to live up to, but whatever it puts before me I take great encouragement that it has been provided by God and it is where he wants my curacy years to be lived out. I hope in return I make him pleased, by a dedicated work hard ethic I also hope and trust it will give me an appreciation of human beings living in less picturesque surroundings than I have been accustomed to. I am desperately keen to be a loyal servant to the parish of St Matthews Burnley and in return pray that the experience will stand me in good stead when God decides it is time to move once more and to do his work once again in pastures new.

I hope this move and the next 8 weeks prepare me for the big move part two when I leave another massive part of my life being that of Store Manager of the laminated catalogue specialist Argos. I certainly hope and pray that it does. I would appreciate your prayers also.

Till next time from Lower Manor Lane

Goodbye and God bless

.Alextheanglican

x

DAN

DAN

Hello once again,

                            A short time ago I came across a picture of myself and my dear wife Sarah from about 1987 or even 1988. I was as handsome as I am now and heading for my eighteenth birthday, Sarah was very pretty, not long past her 16^th birthday and was clever enough to hold down a responsible occupation where the local fish and chip shop would have failed to open for business if it wasn’t for her aptitude at peeling potatoes. I was in full time employment for a defunct electrical business where I had access to a works van and a screwdriver!

A Peeling implement.

Our romance was a slow burner and it was some months later when I rang her from a gay bar in La Manga, Spain to tell her  that I loved her. When she replied, ‘I love you as well’ I put the phone down and couldn’t wait to get home to hold her in my arms and kiss those pretty lips! My best friend Sarah is much more reserved than my good self and would not appreciate endless anecdotes about our courting days, but trips to Blackpool, Morecambe, Southport and anywhere else that were accessible from Burnley bus station provide happy memories of the fledging months of our relationship together.

A Burnley Bus

Access to the van extended our geographical capabilities and we went here there and everywhere until an unfortunate accident on the way to Malham in Yorkshire led to us being incapacitated, stuck in a ditch and being saved by a local farmer This led to a ‘bit’ of a telling off and to having the car removed from my accessibility and heading straight back to the bus station, via the job centre!

Malham

After a while we started living ‘over the brush’ and bought our first house together, we were blissfully happy apart the constant screaming and bellowing from the nut cases that lived next door. Many people kept bringing up the subject of marriage, which I always batted away as I had a deep fear of making a lifelong commitment and was insistent that I never wanted to be betrothed.

And then nearly 17 years ago our young lad Joe arrived on the scene and life was good. Memorable holidays to Devon and Cornwall and Scarborough where we enjoyed watching him going from a baby to a boy. Plans for a house with a garden were on the horizon. And in hindsight holding my son in my arms to the point of losing the blood flow in my limbs as Sarah recovered from the emergency operation whilst listening to Louis Armstrong sing We have all the time in the world, was probably the moment that I realized fatherhood was indeed a lifelong commitment and I had nothing to be scared of.

Mr Armstrong

Not long after in the utterly unromantic setting of our front room surrounded by catalogue clearance furniture whilst doing something completely forgettable, I do recall saying that if Sarah fancied it, we could indeed get married! She shocked me, Sarah is not an emotional person she is very measured and calm. However she was over the moon she was just delighted.  We hugged and if I ever had any doubts about the love she had for me they were completely removed at that point. To be honest she has always loved me, I knew it, but couldn’t

believe it. 

So we did it, we got wed on my dear Fathers 80^th birthday.

And as this amazing beautiful person watched me do all sorts of things that were going to change mine and her life, from football refereeing, hospital radio DJ, Stand Up comedian, writer, poet, she never batted an eyelid, never said, pack it up you pillock! She just supported me, loved me, and encouraged me. As mentioned in a previous blog sitting with Sarah at my side at the Lowry theatre watching a professional stand comic perform my material in front of a packed audience will live long in the memory.

A Football Official

 And now, here today being married to her is the heartbeat of my life, because of her I can be myself, safe in the knowledge that whilst she might tut or shout at me, I know she loves me and our friendship and our marriage will mean we live out our days together. I write this blog because ordination looms, and if there is one thing that is absolutely certain. Without Sarah at my side there is no way, just no way on Gods earth would I be being ordained in the summer at Blackburn Cathedral. I have never been referred to as God’s gift, to women, to comedy, or to retail but I certainly believe that Sarah is indeed God’s gift to me. The road we have travelled together has been so special, lots of setbacks, tears, hurdles for me to overcome to get to this point. I did it because of her, and because I believe God intended me meet her at bus stop back in the days of new romantics and Rick Astley I believe ordination will prove to be a wonderful life changing experience.

New Romantics

Sarah or Dan as I refer to her is preparing to take on the next leg of the journey to our new home in the next month with extraordinary enthusiasm, she continues to support me and love me as I moan about the here and now but by grace to have her in Gods house on the 4^th July (Ordination) is the proudest thing I could wish for besides having three wonderful children who make life hectic, exhausting and utterly exhilarating.

St Matthews Burnley

I do feel God has a plan for all of us, the difficulty sometimes is working it all out, but maybe that’s the whole point. Maybe we are just not meant to know. But by submitting to his will the answers to the conundrums may be revealed, by not submitting you run the risk of never knowing how bloody fantastic it feels to live with her by myside and heavily under the influence of our savior Jesus Christ.

Love to you all

Alextheanglican.

Fry'd Christians

Fry’d Christians

Stephen Fry attacks down the left, no down the right, through the middle round the sides, over the top and smashes the God delusion right into the back of the net! Another resounding victory for the Anti – Christ brigade, in fact I have never been so impressed since Johnny Rottens’ beautiful rendition of Anarchy in the UK on channel 4’s The Tube sometime back in the 1980’s which I incidentally still have somewhere on a high quality but low selling Betamax cassette tape.

And with the usual damnation of all things Jesus he frequently skillfully and meticulously dismantles the concept of a loving God that might one day welcome him with open arms into the bosom of heaven. In fact I believe am I right in saying that if that was to happen to Fry, the great man would decline the offer because  if ‘this’ God was to allow children to contract cancer and so forth then he wanted no part of this notion of heaven. Fry is a master of the English language and has more than one or two supporters if his twitter numbers are anything to go by.  There is no doubt he is a formidable and persuasive supporter of the atheist religion, and one whom I often wish was in the Christian corner of the ring rather than the other side which benefits from such an eloquent and high profile academic/celebrity/writer/director and supporter of gay rights. I admire him greatly he is a man for whom talent is endless as he succeeds in most things he turns his hand to.

And yet whilst he does much damage to Christianity and anything that supports the notion of a higher being, forgive me if I remain as much a doubting Thomas of his position as he is of mine. Within the great man I see a vulnerability that I feel supports the necessity of Christianity and the truthfulness of the faith of which I am part of. Stephen Fry is probably one of my favorite celebrities, one of the people I would definitely have at the top of my dinner party wish list. I am sure he could bamboozle me with anti-Christian rhetoric and take me to the very edge of jumping ship as he crushes my rather simplistic approach to my faith in Jesus as the way and the truth.

I don’t want to get into heavy theological debate about God and suffering, but in a nutshell I would suggest that suffering is a necessary part of our humanity, if we only experienced the highs then I believe we are not living in the real world. The lows remind us of our responsibilities, to love one another in times of difficulty, to pull together in times of strife, to support our friends in times of need and to learn much about our own existence, emotions and well-being.  If life was one big high and nothing went wrong, and nobody got ill, and nobody got hurt and nobody suffered then we would be living in Paradise, and you will not be surprised to hear me suggest that destination Paradise is awaiting not in this life but the next. Mr Fry with all his genius and all his intellect and his success and his wealth is brilliant utterly compelling, I really mean that, but he demonstrates just enough for me to doubt his rhetoric his front and his fabulously articulate destruction of the God that I love and one I believe loves me.

There are three views aren’t there? God exists, God does not exist, I am not sure if God exists or not! Stephen Fry clearly believes God does not exist and in the unlikely event that our paths shall cross I shall leave it to the worlds’ great theologians to argue with Fry and debate the finer points of God as creator or a bang that was very big! For those of you unsure then I absolutely understand the predicament. As for me, with all the sincerity, all the meticulous use of beautiful words, with all the utter genius of Fry, sadly or gladly it is not enough to dissuade me from my absolute conviction in truth of Jesus Christ. Why? Jesus Christ did it all, he loved, he healed,  he cleansed, he grieved, he walked with the lowest of the low, he fought the oppression of humanity, he stood up for his beliefs, he taught about righteousness and the future, and importantly he suffered. He suffered the most despicable and horrendous slaughter. He was humiliated, tortured, and reduced to nothing, and he died on the cross. His legacy leaves hope in a bright tomorrow, a way of life that can’t be criticized. Where is the harm in loving thy neighbor as thyself? Christianity has much to be rightly criticized for, organized religion has many flaws, and I am not responsible for the wrong doings of so called ‘Christians’ who have damaged the good name of Jesus. But I am responsible for telling the truth as I see it. As Fry is a man of integrity and genius I consider myself a much less successful individual but equally a man of integrity and my words may be much less persuasive and far less articulate than my favorite quiz show host but never the less they are written with absolute truth as I see it. I pray for Fry sometimes, why? I think he needs praying for, he may see that as condescending and inappropriate, I see it as absolutely necessary.

The secular word wants less Faith and more fiction; I understand this but the media moguls, the anti- Christ army and the sometimes offensive bigotry to people of faith should not surprise those who live it. Nobody said following Christ would be easy, it isn’t but following ones faith should prove fruitful in the end.

In Christ

Alextheanglican

The difference a year makes.

Hello and Happy New Year,

This is the day the Lord hath made and it is also the year God has strangely decided by his grace that I shall be ordained in. And indeed what a difference a year makes, Our New year celebrations were a little different this time round and we had a pleasant evening playing board games and indulging in an Iceland platter that did little to arouse the taste buds as we attempted to guess what we were eating and where the duck had absconded to, in the spring roll that was sadly lacking character and taste.

I think the first sentence to leave my mouth the moment Big Ben lit the indulgent fuse wire on the London fireworks was ‘I’m getting ordained this year’ and it was not to dissimilar the year before when the only difference was the addition of the  word ‘next’. It has to be said it has and continues to be roller coaster of emotions as I go from excitement to anxiety, to enthusiasm to frustration and tolerance to impatience. 

 However ordination is creeping ever closer but it doesn’t necessarily make things any easier to deal with.  We are fortunate enough to have our housing arrangements sorted which is something that some of my peers still have to finalize and as the property is empty we are able to pop along and begin to plan what will go where and who will have which room etc. The house is lovely and will provide us with a delightful family home throughout my curacy, but when I stand alone in the vast lounge or slow step around the study that looks out onto a lovely garden I really do reflect upon the journey thus far and wonder how it all got to this stage.  In hindsight a lesson I have learned and continue to learn is to trust in God and accept his will whatever that may be.

A friend said to me recently I can see you slowly turning into a Vicar! I took it as a compliment and as I reflect upon this long road to ordination it somehow rings true, The years of study, preparation, prayers, travel (boy have I done some miles?) reflection, laughs, tears are indeed slowly preparing me for a new life as a man of the cloth!  Occasionally I meet someone I haven’t seen for many years and when I tell them my new pathway they are initially quite shocked and wonder what happened to the previous ambition of being a stand –up comedian or full time jester in the retail sector.  Well if the recent residential at Rydal Hall was anything to go by the hilarity and sense of fun is still very much in the bones that God created. It was lovely seeing some dear friends with tear filled eyes laughing out loud as we let off a bit of steam as we journey together on the road to ordination. I am indeed slowly turning, or preparing for life anew and I am looking forward to it very much but it doesn’t come without sadness.

Work has many  finalities about it at the moment, last peak conference, last Argos Christmas, last annual performance review, last catalogue launch, etc. and whilst it may be assumed I can’t wait to go, it is most certainly not the case. After giving 15 years of my working life to the company with the laminated browsers it is going to be very difficult to say goodbye to the world of retail that has provided for me and my family since I first was employed by Curry’s at the tender age of just 15. Argos has pretty much been a great experience and has been a wonderful training facility for ordained ministry Trust me there is no walk of life that has not been experienced during my time as a retail business leader. The pastoral experiences have been unending, from bereavements to family breakdowns, from shoplifters to homeless people sleeping in bins, from acts of kindness to lessons learnt, Argos has been incredible.

For now I continue to do my best for my employers, January is never an easy time, but trying to encourage my team to prepare for a new boss and keep motivated is the focus of my attention at this moment. By mid-May my work with Argos will be done, I will be very sad to say goodbye but will take many happy memories and some wonderful friends.  At home the excitement and preparation slowly builds, a bit like looking forward to the holiday of a life time, not that I expect ordination to be like a holiday. But preparing, forming, whatever it’s identified as is joyful and scary, daunting and enthralling I am looking forward most definitely. I have returned to my sending church Higham St Johns, where the support is encouraging and affirming.

St Matthews in Burnley will be my future home that will offer new experiences, new challenges, and it will be exciting to see how my ministry and discipleship to God develops. I am getting ready to serve the people and Christ, I’m not quite ready yet, but through the support of my most amazing and beautiful wife Sarah and my friends and by the grace and
love of God by the time July 4^th arrives I will be able and ready to serve God as a Deacon then Priest then Vicar for the rest of my working life.

Your prayers will be appreciated,

Much love

Alextheanglican.

Advent.

Well hello,

                  Today is the beginning of Advent, did you know that? Or are you so busy you don’t have time or the inclination to even consider the Christian concept of Christmas?

The news coverage over the last few days has been quite incredible as we observe dear old ladies and gentlemen get trampled over and battered by humans of varying ethnicities as they scramble for 50 inch televisions assembled in the most cost effective countries to do nothing more than increase the footfall into Supermarket ‘hangers’ and satisfy the ever uneasy shareholder. It’s the bloke who went in for a Warburton’s loaf and some fairy liquid that I feel sorry for!

I’ve worked in retail all my life, Black Friday didn’t exist a few years ago, It has been embraced into the bosom of society like a re run of Morecambe and Wise or Only Falls and Horses. Somebody has gone, ‘we’ll have a bit of that’ and bing, bang, bosh, people have turned into frenzied monsters who in a few more years will arrive at ASDA in full combat gear, all tooled up and ready to inflict immense pain on the enemy in the desire to grab a sandwich toaster that nobody wanted the day before. It’s landed quicker than a crow on a deceased hedgehog.  Retailers wont just need security they will require a border crossing, bullet proof vests and no man’s land area that keeps the animals from the meat, so to speak!

I have to be honest and suggest this utter ridiculous and embarrassing behavior by the human race is indicative of our society today. This shameful display by individuals clambering over one another to gain an advantage is common place throughout industry today and frankly only enhances my belief and faith in the way and truthfulness of Christianity in its purest form.  Expectation that you only succeed in life is a huge burden to carry, why do we always have to get what we want? Why do we always have to be successful? Why do we always have to do better than the man or woman that walks by our side?  I would suggest that sometimes it is good to be vulnerable; sometimes it’s okay not to be running on a full tank, sometimes it okay to do absolutely nothing.  The supermarket  debacle only reinforces my belief that when we should be resting we are out battling and fighting to gain an advantage over someone else and on this occasion the competitive edge led to fighting, abuse and shame on the man or women that was kicking ten bells of the you know what out of the weaker individual in the desire to grab a cheaply manufactured television that will probably pack up working before the next Black Friday.

This Urban warfare should remind us all of what society is becoming and at the beginning of advent Christians are encouraged to prepare to celebrate the coming of Christmas, would you know that? Has that had any media coverage? Is that given any press space? Can anybody even be bothered to consider Christmas in its Christian form? For Christians, Christmas has been robbed it has been ripped away from them by a consumerist society that places significant financial burdens upon families and creates the anticlimax that it’s all over come Boxing Day when the scrap for the next Matsui or Blaupunkt piece of electrical hardware takes place up and down the high street. For Christians Christmas doesn’t finish on Christmas day, it begins!

I don’t for one minute believe this situation will change any time soon but I do want anybody who might read this little advent rant to consider the Christian message that is delivered this coming Christmas. Whatever your view of Christians, religion, me! The story of Jesus is not that unbelievable, just very helpful, He came into the world to help us, to save us from ourselves, to teach us the idea that we can heal and be healed, and to love one another.

We all claim to be in shock and awe at the recent clips of ‘nutters’ fighting for a successful haul, but be honest with yourself, could that have been you? How far are you being pushed in the search for success?

Advent affords you the opportunity to claim back a bit of yourself if that makes sense? A chance to re-evaluate your own self-being. To consider your own existence and the purpose of being alive.  If you feel you have lost your identity or are being manufactured into something you are not then let advent encourage to do something about, The message of Christ is simple and I repeat’ he came into the world to help us, to save us from ourselves, to teach us the idea we can heal and be healed, and to love one another.

Black Friday, was meaningless, the consumerist Christmas is short lived, the lovely time you will spend with your families is real, the twelve days of Christmas begin on Christmas Day, and I encourage that if possible you extend your season of goodwill to then and beyond, and use advent as a time of reflection and consider where you’re up to and what is important in your life.

In Christ

Alex the Anglican