My Sandals and I

Proverbs 17:22 A joyful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.

Hi,
   Now i,m signed up for the journey to ordination I look at my Regatta Sandals through a new set of lenses, They were purchased originally about a year ago for trips to the beach on our Summer excursion to Turkey. But now these Sandals have a whole new set of opportunities to explore and "play up" to the typical christian stereotype.
Firstly I was wondering if I could possibly get away with wearing them in the workplace, but after trying them out with my "George from ASDA" nylon acrylic suit they didn't quite do themselves justice, particularly with the white socks I was wearing.
Then I tried the dusty walk down the not so dusty farm track trying to emulate the feeling from the desert, but as the water levels from the recent poor levels are still quite high, I returned home with stony socks and damp feet.
My next opportunity was the school run, but to add traditional authenticity to the journey I covered myself in a duvet and pillow case to make myself have that look of the Hebrew world, but it was only when "a mother" suggested that Hannah Montanah bed linen was not really of that time.
Next the supermarket run, but after being the victim of trolley rage to an erratic elderly lady he took me out with a heavy load, of Horlicks and firelighters I was left nursing 3 blackened toes and slight tear to my left sandal.
Did the church run nobody batted an eyelid!

Did the trip to the tip, but was refused entry as they were considered a violation of the strict health and safety regulations, but I was lucky as my wife's high heels that were being donated to charity got past "waste" border control without anybody batting an eyelid, although they did chafe around the heel a little.
Bumped into a couple of clergy, who inquired with great gusto "Are they the Regatta, Sahara streemline"? and then talked at great length of the classic sandal manufacturers, like, Dunlop, Asics, Mitre, and of the very durable Gola range.
One gave me a copy of Sandal monthly, and the other a copy of Sandal weekly, where there was a feature on  Mother Theresas top ten selling sandals.
They invited me to the Sandals Summer conference in Lytham St Annes, but as I'd already committed to the knitted tank top trade show in Skipton, and as I was modeling a mohair number in royal blue, I had to let them down. I was also most interested to see Mrs Slack, give her, HOW TO KNIT WITH BODY HAIR demonstration, although in hindsight it was a little disappointing as Mrs Slack was taken ill after a accident with some Babyliss Shavers and her husband Nigel.
I,m not sure if I fit the stereotype to be honest, I mean I do appreciate the open toe look, but I do like shorts with knee length grey socks and I sometimes feel "that look" with a sandal can be a little too, elaborate, and so I may return to a sturdy brogue, or a comfortable pair of Hi Tech trainers.
So sadly for my regattas they will resume a yearly airing, during the holiday season, and will not represent the christian stereotype I so obviously portray!
Alextheanglican.